The Importance of Shifting Gears

Wherever your road leads, let’s travel together with faith and courage. Read more...

"Right foot on the brake, turn the key to start, left foot on the clutch, shift to 1st gear, then slowly release the clutch as you step on the gas, and go!"

My father's words still echo in my mind as a cherished memory whenever I think of the day he taught me how to drive a manual transmission car. It was a driving lesson I'll never forget, not just because I found it amusing that he was a nervous wreck by the time we finished but also because he taught me much more than the importance of shifting gears that day. That driving lesson was more than just a practice run behind the wheel—it turned into a lesson about maneuvering the many twists and turns found on the open road of life.

Anyone who has driven a stick shift knows it can be a challenge and takes practice to learn. Mastering the art of shifting gears and maneuvering the pedals while keeping your hands on the wheel and eyes on the road takes patience and practice to achieve coordination and precision. It’s a process that mirrors life itself since life often presents us with moments of uncertainty, where we’re unsure of the road ahead. Challenges arise—some big, some small—requiring us to shift gears while continuing to move forward. These moments push us to adapt, learn, and grow, preparing us for whatever lies ahead.

During these pivotal moments, we find ourselves at a crossroads, faced with a choice. We can give up, throw our hands up in frustration, get out of the car, slam the door shut, and walk away from the challenges. Or we can take a deep breath, acknowledge the uncertainty, buckle up for the ride, step on the gas, and go—boldly moving forward, even when it feels daunting.

What about those times when the road gets especially rough? When we encounter roadblocks of hurt and rejection, particularly in places we least expect, like the church?

Facing Church Hurt

One of the most painful challenges many believers face is church hurt—the wounds inflicted when those entrusted to lead and guide instead cause harm. Church hurt can drive people away from the Body of Christ, leaving them disillusioned and disconnected. It comes in many forms and is one of the primary reasons both Christians and non-Christians choose to distance themselves from or refrain from embracing Christianity.

As a former member of a religious cult, I experienced the anguish of church hurt firsthand. For years, I carried the weight of betrayal, manipulation, and broken trust. These experiences left lasting scars that almost destroyed my faith. I witnessed church hurt create a deep divide, not just between me and the church, but between me and Jesus. It’s one of the leading reasons many choose to walk away from their faith altogether, and for over 20 years, it’s what led me to walk away from mine.

But my story doesn’t end there.

The Road to Forgiveness and Healing

In processing my pain, I found myself turning to Scripture. One verse, in particular, stood out like a beacon of hope:

"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32, NIV).

Paul’s words challenged me to extend the compassion and grace I had received from Jesus to others, even those who had hurt me. Forgiveness didn’t mean forgetting or dismissing the harm done. Instead, it was about releasing the pain to Jesus and allowing His love to restore what had been broken. At first, this felt impossible. Forgiveness felt like a massive roadblock that I could not and, if I'm honest, did not want to get past. But as I leaned into Paul’s words, I discovered they worked like a key, unlocking the chains of my past hurts and swinging the door to forgiveness wide open. Slowly but surely, the divide between Jesus and me, caused by my past, was bridged, and I began to experience His unwavering love in new, transformative ways.

Moving Forward

For me, church hurt was one of the roughest roads I've traveled. The scars were deep, and the healing journey often felt overwhelming. But through the pain and struggle, I discovered that just like the lesson my father taught me that day, life, like driving a manual car, often requires us to shift gears to keep moving forward. There are moments when you need to downshift to slow down and process the hurt. Then, there are moments when we must shift into higher gear, trusting that even in our most painful moments, the hope and healing found in Jesus has the power to mend even the deepest wounds we thought would never heal.

If you’ve experienced church hurt, I want you to know—I see you. I’ve been there, too. That pain is real and can leave you feeling disheartened and alone. But here’s what I’ve learned: your story doesn’t end with the hurt. My story is living proof of that truth! When I felt lost, Jesus met me with grace. When I felt too broken to move forward, He showed me a way forward—a road marked by compassion, forgiveness, and healing. It wasn’t always easy, and there were moments I doubted. But through it all, Jesus stayed by my side, steady and present, guiding me through every twist and turn.

If you find yourself at a crossroads, uncertain of what lies ahead, take heart, you are not alone. Life’s journey can often feel daunting, filled with twists, turns, and unexpected detours. But even in the struggle, Jesus is there, patiently waiting, ready to guide you. Wherever your road leads, let’s travel together with faith and courage, shifting gears as needed and placing our trust in Him, come what may.