When Religion Isn't Enough: Making Space for the Father’s Love

I only had to receive God’s love, not earn it. As the ultimate Father, His love is unconditional.

Click here to listen to this devotional written and narrated by Jen Roland.

If you had asked me ten years ago how long I’d been a Christian, I wouldn’t have hesitated to say, “My whole life.” I grew up in a loving home, attended church, prayed at meals and bedtime, and followed the rules. I rooted my faith in tradition and values—honesty, kindness, and gratitude. But over time, I realized something that changed everything: knowing about God and knowing God are not the same.

I had a religion. I did the “right things,” but I didn’t have a relationship with God. Although I believed in Him, I didn’t know His voice. I prayed out of habit but didn’t expect Him to respond. While I called myself a Christian, my heart remained distant from God. Everything changed when I realized God was inviting me to walk with Him, not to perform for Him. He wasn’t after my spiritual checklist—He wanted my heart.

One night, overwhelmed and longing for something real, I prayed a simple but honest prayer: “God, make yourself real to me.” I asked Him to take the lead, to release me from striving, and to replace my plans with His. I asked His Spirit to fill me, guide me, and change me from the inside out. Shallow faith no longer sufficed. I wanted depth and genuine connection. I wanted Him. When I sought God, I found Him as a present, tender Father, not a distant deity. I encountered His all-encompassing, steadfast love, the love described in 1 John 3:1: “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!”

I only had to receive God’s love, not earn it. As the ultimate Father, His love is unconditional.

Like any relationship, intimacy requires intentionality. I stopped waiting to clean myself up before coming to God. When I said, “Here I am,” He showed up. My raw, unfiltered self was exactly who He wanted to love.

I then created space for stillness. At first, the silence felt uncomfortable. But soon, it became sacred. In the stillness, I exchanged hurrying for healing, noise for nearness, and distraction for direction. God wasn’t silent—He was waiting for my attention.

Further, I approached Scripture as a conversation rather than a textbook. I didn’t understand everything I read, but I kept showing up, reading slowly, asking questions, and journaling what I sensed God was saying in His Word. Over time, the Bible became personal to me. It progressed from distant truth to intimate dialogue. It became my Heavenly Father’s love letter to me.

Next, I stopped relying on scripted prayers and spoke from my heart. I let go of the pressure to sound polished and talked to God like a friend. My words weren’t fancy, but they were real. And slowly, prayer felt like a home rather than a duty.

When I joined a new church, I found a small group of women who were hungry for God. Their authenticity inspired me, and their faith fueled my faith. Doing life alongside others who loved Jesus helped me grow in ways that I never could have achieved alone.

God transformed my life rather than merely tidying it. He gave me fresh eyes for my marriage, motherhood, and calling. God turned my pain into purpose and shifted my focus from building my resume to building His Kingdom. Most importantly, I realized God gives us a love we can finally rest in—a love that flows from His presence rather than our performance.

I learned that religion checks boxes, but a relationship with the Lord changes hearts. I chose a relationship with God over religion, relishing His presence instead of trying to do more for Him. That decision made all the difference.

Where in your life are you still operating in religion when God is inviting you into a relationship with Him? What’s one way you can make space to receive the Father’s love this week?

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